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Recipe: Wild Muskrat Milk
submitted over 4 years ago by mysticalbuffalo

In Ojibwe Mythology the Muskrat plays a key role in the world's creation and also still holds a prominent place in the cultures of various other Native Americans in the Michigan U.S. area. It has long been valued as an abundant local foodstuff and is so treasured that the Catholic Archdiocese of Detroit granted a Special Dispensation for people to eat it during Fridays and other required days of fasting during Lent. Its milk has a distinct sour smell and grainy texture that is a very difficult taste to acquire for those not from its home region but is said to be well worth the effort for the mentally unstable that unfortunately do. This smell stems from its varied diet of stillwater weeds with the occasional pond scum and bottom dwellers that give their lactose that extra special zip. Many locals say that capturing them live and feeding them a steady diet of bread and milk for a minimum of 2 weeks cleans out their digestive tracts and makes the milk more palatable, yet there are others that say there's no substitute for one that's wild caught and freshly milked.

TFA Sweet Cream DX and OOO Cheese The main flavor of this recipe. Locals are sharply divided on whether the musk note of muskrat milk is from the milk itself or from the garbage cans in which it is customarily stored.

FW Honeywood Tobacco and OOO Pickle These combine into the sharp uric tang that is reminiscent of prisons and jails worldwide and is the second thing that most people notice when gagging down this most noxious liquid.

OOO Tamarind My initial version used FA Dark Bean which will do the job in a pinch however after a sft of Tamarind I knew it was perfect. This woefully underutilized flavor adds the fecal texture that makes this profile distinct and not for the weak willed.

Note 1

Do not steep this! Like the real milk, it's best fresh.

Note 2

WS-23 can be added at 3%-4% for those that like their piss cold.

Wild Muskrat Milk

  • TFA Sweet Cream DX 6.00 %
  • OOO Cheese 4.50 %
  • FW Honeywood Tobacco 3.75 %
  • OOO Pickle 3.00 %
  • OOO Tamarind 1.50 %

Happy Shitpost Sunday!

Comments
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6 points
 
by Apexifiedover 4 years agoThe Kingmaker

You're doing this right

4 points
 
by apocalypticdiynewbover 4 years ago

I bet 3% Tfa Honey would make this into a bomb ass milk and honey recipe. Something to die for.

2 points
 
by mysticalbuffaloover 4 years ago

I considered it. Unfortunately it wasn't gamey enough for my taste and even the cat couldn't stop vomiting enough to try it.

2 points
 
by QueenBuzyBeeover 4 years ago

It certainly would add some lovely skunk!

4 points
 
by EdibleMalfunctionover 4 years agoI found my thrill on Blueberry Hill

Well played buffalo. Well played.

4 points
 
by jasone414over 4 years agoProud Sidebar Reader!

This is the first recipe that I've ever seen that I'm missing all the flavors

3 points
 
by mudclubover 4 years ago

What the fuck.

I think I'm gonna have to order shit to try this.

4 points
 
by mysticalbuffaloover 4 years ago

All hope abandon ye who enter here

3 points
 
by bigtidderover 4 years agoSalty Dog

God dammit now I need to order OOO Cheese

3 points
 
by QueenBuzyBeeover 4 years ago

Get some Beef and Bacon and Fish while you‘re at it. Endless possibilities!

2 points
 
by St1llFrankover 4 years agoThis flavor... This is not my kind of flavor

Some of my earliest memories are smelling skinned muskrat and beaver. My dad had pelts stretching and drying all over the place. Shit was nasty. Those critters without any fur on them weren't really viewing pleasure for a kid either. I come from Minnesota Ojibwe and we've never eaten muskrat lmao. "You can pretty much milk anything with nipples." -Gregory Focker

2 points
 
by Morgan_Druryover 4 years agoCoil Sauce Sommelier

I wear it to ward off skunks.

2 points
 
by NudeNicotineover 4 years ago

Shitpost sunday gold!!!!! :D

1 points
 
by mysticalbuffaloover 4 years ago

Hey thanks!

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