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The 5 Personality Types of DIYers (Humor)
submitted about 10 years ago by [deleted]

Just poking fun here -- mostly at myself.

The Alchemist: Half-mad. Convinced that they (and they alone) can turn VG/PG into gold. Spends enough on flavoring to support a third-world village with food and clean water for a year. Secretly measures by celestial alignment. Steeps by lunar phase. Thinks like (and usually drinks like) a chef — which is to say irrationally (and in quantity). Typical recipe contains a minimum of eleven ingredients. No, make that twelve.

The Extractor: Obsessive. Has ceased purchasing commercial flavorings altogether. Can be found wandering spice shops muttering “Ceylon or Madagascar…hmmm?” Dangerously thin as they’ve stopped eating and have chosen instead to soak their food in solvents to see what happens. Owns a lot of coffee filters and Ball jars. Only friends: a crockpot, a funnel and a microwave.

The Naif: Annoying. Mixes everything starting at 20%. Easily frustrated. Obsessed with remaking "Hawk Sauce". Ignores links to "Hawk Sauce flavoring" because it’s “too expensive and I wanna do it myself”. Induces suicidal and homicidal thoughts in The Alchemist, The Scientist and The Extractor. Will eventually morph into one of the other personality types or just piss-off to VU. Favorite phrase: “Wait, what sidebar?”. Often uses the word “dude” when posting.

The Scientist: Neurotic. Only buys component molecules. Convinced that they (and they alone) can turn these molecules into transcendent flavorings. (see also:The Alchemist) Likes to tag flavors with their chemical component names. Usually wrong as they lack even rudimentary training in chemistry. Only measures by weight. Frustrated that their scale doesn’t do micrograms. Steeps using an atomic clock and a circulator. Considering purchasing a white smock, lab bench and air filtration unit.

The Cloner: Masochist Obsessively tries to duplicate one of the marquee juice maker’s marquee juices. Vacillates wildly between triumphal certainty that they’ve “nailed it” and self-loathing that they suck at this. Lives a life of quiet desperation hoping that one of the big boys will notice their efforts and chime in, letting them know how completely wrong they are. Dreams of a life chained to a lab table in /u/_Bombies basement. Employs a Dominatrix in the meantime.

The Damned: Normal. Just looking for something better and cheaper. The Damned wander innocently into DIY_eJuice like lambs to slaughter. Has read all the sidebar links. Somewhat frightened by The Scientist and Alchemist. One wrong step from becoming one of the other personality types. Should be warned about risks of financial and emotional ruin. Convinced they’ll be set with a ten flavors and 6 dropper bottles. Dante weeps for thee.

[edit: forgot about The Cloner! Make that 6 Types...]

Comments
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28 points
 
by DownwardSpiralsabout 10 years agoOne of "The Damned"

Can I get "The Damned" as flair in this subreddit due to this thread?

Edit: I wonder if /u/kirkt can hook it up...

5 points
 
by NA_Aspireabout 10 years agoMixologist

I need it too.

1 points
 
by bravoj98about 10 years agoMixologist

This needs to be a thing

1 points
 
by prokreatabout 10 years ago

yes! i want that as well... before its too late.

1 points
 
by kirktabout 10 years agoBring on the Diacetyl, baby

It is now an option.

1 points
 
by DownwardSpiralsabout 10 years agoOne of "The Damned"

Yay!

15 points
 
by Sparkasaurusmexabout 10 years ago

The Penny Pincher- Really doesn't care what it tastes like. Saves a fortune making single flavor DIY juice. Embarrassed when anyone asks to taste his/her vape.

3 points
 
by Penny_is_a_Bitchabout 10 years ago

this is me thus far. I have six flavours, all used individually.

They're... ok. Blueberry is pretty good.

2 points
 
by Wo0d643about 10 years ago

That would be me. I started out with making good juice and getting like 6 recipes. I now two and im good.

1 points
 
by mnementh666about 10 years ago

Almost embarrassed. Ain't nothin' wrong with Jackfruit or Dragonfruit. :)

8 points
 
by fritobandito32about 10 years ago

"Obsessed with remaking Hawk Sauce" hahahahaha

7 points
 
by CloudAlchemistabout 10 years agoMixologist

looks at recipes and flavor shelf

...this hits pretty close to home, are you spying on me? ಠ_ಠ

6 points
 
by TomHanksDiedabout 10 years ago

A few more flavors and ill be at the Alchemist level.

(Sweetener) 10% CITRIC ACI 7 Leaves (FA) Acai Berry (FW) Acetyl Pyrazine 5% Acetyl Pyrazine 5% (TPA) Apple (FA) Apple Pie (FA) Apricot (FA) Aroma Caramel (FA) Banana (FA) Banana Nut Bread (TPA) Bavarian Cream (TPA) Bavarian Cream (TPA) Black Cherry (FW) black currant Black Tea (FA) Blackberry (FW) Blackcurrant (FA) Blenderize (Tutti Frutti) (FA) Blueberry Cinnamon Crumble (Cap) Blueberry Extra (TPA) Brown Sugar Extra (TPA) Butter Cream (FW) Cake Batter (Cap) Cappuccino (FA) Caramel (FA) Caramel (Original) (TPA) Caramel Candy (FA) Catalan Cream (FA) Chai Tea (TPA) Cheesecake (Graham Crust) (TPA) Cherry (FA) Chocolate (FA) Chocolate Coconut Almond (Cap) Chocolate Glazed Doughnut (Cap) Cigar Passion (FA) Cinnamon Ceylon (FA) Cinnamon Danish Swirl (Cap) Cinnamon Sugar Cookie (TPA) Citrict acid Cocoa (FA) Coconut (FA) Coffee Espresso (FA) cola (tfa) Cookie (FA) Cookies flavourart Cotton Candy (tfa) Cream Fresh (FA) Custard (FA) Dark Vapure (FA) Double Chocolate (Dark) (TPA) Dragon Fruit (FW) Dragonfruit (TPA) Dulce de Leche (TPA) Earl Grey Tea Ethyl Maltol 10% FA Lemon Sicily FA Mandarin Flavor FA peach French Vanilla (TPA) French Vanilla Creme (TPA) French Vanilla Deluxe (TPA) Fuji Apple (FA) FW - Graham Cracker Golden Pineapple (Cap) Graham Cracker v2 (Cap) Grapefruit (FA) Hazelnut (TPA) Honey (TPA) Honeydew (TPA) Honeysuckle (TPA) Horehound (TPA) Irish Cream (FA) Jamaican Rum (FA) Key Lime (TPA) Kiwi Double (TPA) Koolada 10% (TPA) Lemon Lemon (FE) Lemon Sicily (FA) Lime Tahity Cold Pressed (FA) Madagascar (Vanilla Classic) (FA) Mandarin (FA) Mango (FA) Maple Syrup (FA) Marshmallow (Cap) Marzipan (FA) Meringue (FA) MTS Vape Wizard (FA) Oba Oba (FA) Orange Cream (TPA) Organic Peach (NF) Pear (TPA) Pie Crust (TPA) Pineapple (FA) Pomegranate (FA) Rainbow Line Gum (FW) Raspberry (FA) Red Touch (Strawberry) (FA) Red Touch (Strawberry) (FA) Ripe Banana (TPA) Rootbeer Float (FW) RY -4 TDM INW Salted Caramel (FW) Sparkling Wine (Inawera) Spearmint (FA) Strawberry (TPA) Summer Clouds (FA) Sweet Cream (TPA) Sweet Watermelon (Cap) Tiramisu (FA) Toasted Marshmallow (TPA) Torrone (FA) Us Red Mix (Inawera) Vanilla Bean Gelato (TPA) Vanilla Cupcake (Cap) Vanilla Custard v1 (Cap) Vanilla Custard v2 (Cap) Vanilla Swirl (TPA) Vanilla Tahity (FA) Vienna Cream (FA) Vienna Cream (FA) Waffle (Belgian) (TPA) Whipped Cream (TPA)

15 points
 
by LittleBobby_Tablesabout 10 years ago

Sounds good, but need percentages. What do you call this Alchemist recipe of yours?

3 points
 
by Epicurus1about 10 years ago

I can't even begin to imagine what that would be like. But I'd pay to try it.

-4 points
 
by Devo9090about 10 years agoFrugivore

It's a collection, not a recipe.

1 points
 
by RathkampDrumsabout 10 years ago

Wapatuli.

3 points
 
by grrumble66about 10 years ago

Only 125 flavorings? :P

3 points
 
by meanrockSDabout 10 years ago

Right? and here I am with my plastic storage cases of flavoring. But the mix I'm vaping is good, so I got that going for me, which is nice.

2 points
 
by sammy36about 10 years ago

I started with plastic but the collection pile got too big and well, tacky looking. Had to get wooden cigar boxes so the piles of flavoring looked more inspiring! I sort into boxes by flavor brand and then type (fruit, tobacco, nuts, ect.) aaaand I probably need an intervention....but it's tasty and fun!

1 points
 
by Jtetsukiabout 10 years ago

Don't feel bad. I have around that same amount or more. It becomes an addiction. Especially when I found places that sell Flavour Art in smaller bottles.

2 points
 
by captaincannibalabout 10 years ago

I'd rather jump off a bridge than try to sort through and list all my flavorings.

1 points
 
by TomHanksDiedabout 10 years ago

I did it for ease. e-liquid-recipes.com makes it very nice to make juice

1 points
 
by Malygnantabout 10 years ago

What does the citric acid bring to your flavors? I get some people that say it doesn't do anything and others that say it's good in fruit flavors?

1 points
 
by RobocopSuperfanabout 10 years ago

It adds just a little bit of sour into the mix, and yes, IMO it's great with most fruit flavours. It doesn't make a HUGE difference (it's basically more of a toner than a flavour) so you're not missing a ton without it.

Some people also seem to get a touch of respiratory irritation from it too.. I personally don't, but I've read of people getting lung pains that they equate to citric acid usage - and it's no myth, the stuff is harmful if inhaled in large quantities. I just must be tough/big enough, or maybe it's that I don't overuse it.

1 points
 
by Malygnantabout 10 years ago

It dissolves in pg?

1 points
 
by clancy6969about 10 years ago

It makes me cough on my mustard cream clone, but the real stuff did too so, good call I say.

6 points
 
by Helfrd0771about 10 years ago

This should be added to the side bar

7 points
 
by PM_Me_Your_Clonesabout 10 years ago

But no one would read it and they'd just ask you "Dude, what do you mean do I wanna be an Alchemist or just one of the Damned? Is that TFA?"

6 points
 
by PM_ME_YOUR_BREAKFASTabout 10 years ago

I'd like to add one, if I could.

There's always the "Dude, you gotta try this!" Eccentric. Usually not half-bad at making juice. Constantly messing around with new recipes. Insists that everyone they know that vapes should try their juice. Still only owns about 10 flavors, but can make a good mix out of them. Steeps by forgetting about large amounts of juice they've moved on from.

5 points
 
by rakeleerabout 10 years agoOne of "The Damned"

Dude. Ding dong. Now what?

3 points
 
by fizzmustardabout 10 years agoBest Recipe of 2014

I can't help but feel like you had specific users in mind :)

2 points
 
by redruffensoreabout 10 years ago

We accept you. One of us.

3 points
 
by narfig_agarabout 10 years ago

Hmmm...I have 30 bottles of un-labled juice. I never use recipes, and do the math in my head. I have a hundred or so flavours, yet I buy my VG at the drug store. I add Stevia to EVERYTHING. Sometimes I taste my juices with my tongue.

Alchemist. Totally mad.

4 points
 
by InertiaCreepingabout 10 years agoJust another Moderator

> I add Stevia to EVERYTHING

....

2 points
 
by modulemoduleabout 10 years ago

Who knew Lydia does DIY...

1 points
 
by BooksofMagicabout 10 years agoMixologist

> I add Stevia to EVERYTHING. Sometimes I taste my juices with my tongue.

I've noticed this too with Stevia. But usually only over .25% Below that it's just sweet.

3 points
 
by DrMclovensabout 10 years ago

COME ON lololol we are all waiting to hear from /u/abdadda this post is hilarious.

i probably fall closest to the alchemist haha. Nobody can hate this post, unless you simply can't laugh at yourself.

idk, i have a strong sense of humor though, so this was GREAT

2 points
 
by hotwingsandcoldbeerabout 10 years agoTobacconist

Fawking hilarious. And so true. Almost time for bed and I finally chuckled today.

2 points
 
by clancy6969about 10 years ago

I literally found out I was going to be a dad two days after I placed my first meagre order of DIY stuff. I wonder how much I would have blown on supplies by now and which group I would fall into.

1 points
 
by redruffensoreabout 10 years ago

Fawking congrats dude!

2 points
 
by nhucalabout 10 years agoOne of "The Damned"

I'm an even newer version of The Damned, I have two 15 ml bottles, 3 bottles of 177 ml VG, and two Lorann bottles of flavoring...

2 points
 
by VapedManabout 10 years agoOne of "The Damned"

Wal*mart FTW.

1 points
 
by nhucalabout 10 years agoOne of "The Damned"

WOO! Someone understands! All about that HUMCO life XD

2 points
 
by JohnGoattiabout 10 years ago

The Have a go hero : Doesn't understand their concentrates or %'s and stumbles on blindly convinced that one of these days they'll make the perfect juice by simply mixing all the things.

1 points
 
by soad2237about 10 years ago

This is hilarious. I know some "scientists" and it fits so perfectly.

1 points
 
by dsfkjsdabout 10 years ago

Side bar is TLDR

1 points
 
by DrMclovensabout 10 years ago

that was a great read. honestly. thanks for making me laugh

1 points
 
by jacatroabout 10 years ago

Love it!

1 points
 
by jordan917about 10 years ago

This is just too great

1 points
 
by scoopylooabout 10 years ago

Love it!

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